Six ‘Pill-Free’ Secrets To Happiness

by Blair Lewis
excerpted from Happiness: The Real Medicine and How It Works

How can I become happy is perhaps the central question of human existence. People are trying desperately to achieve happiness. We accumulate wealth, seek validation in romantic partners, drown our pain in food, alcohol, cosmetic surgery or expensive designer shoes. Increasingly, we clamor for “happy pills” and expensive therapy sessions. Yet, as a culture and as individuals, happiness seems to elude us. Happiness is not something we have to seek out or acquire. It simply is.

Six universal traits possessed by happy people, an ancient list of the late Swami Rama of the Himalayas.

Happiness Trait #1 A Quiet Mind

A quiet mind requires stillness. Slowing down the train of thoughts begins with an outward blockade of sensory input. To quiet the lake of the mind, the neighbors (the five senses) have to stop throwing pebbles into the lake. In time, the lake becomes still, and the mind is transparent. As waters clear, the jewels at the bottom of the lake become visible to the surface-dwelling mind. This initial glimpse of inner wealth propels us further in the direction of self-exploration and self-transformation. According to his teacher, Pandit Rajmani Tigunait, Ph.D., “To be happy requires no effort. That is why meditation should be effortless. If you work hard at meditating, you are engaging the mind, and in the end, you will be tired. Meditation is refreshing and empowering if you let it be natural and spontaneous. Stay focused on the coolness and warmth of the breath or any valid tool to meditate on. But do not struggle; do not work at it. Just observe your mind and gently guide your attention to the proper object of your meditation.”

Happiness Trait #2 Self-restraint

Having worked in a modern psychiatric clinic I noticed most patients are simultaneously infatuated and repulsed by their own desires. They know they should stop certain behaviors (their actions make their lives miserable) but cannot escape the strangleholds. Their own lifestyles ensnare them because they lack self-restraint. Yoga’s method of self-restraint begins with an external approach, attempting to organize the student’s life and living environment. This approach is very concrete and provides quick, tangible results. Begin by creating stability in your world as you know it. Next, create a clean home and predictable schedule. Then fill your home with love, honesty, respect, and openness. These new choices create new grooves through which your mind can flow—preparing yourself for the internal path of self-transformation.

Happiness Trait #3 Endurance

Self-transformation is not a sprint; it is a marathon. To finish the race, you are going to have to find and organize all memories of success and survival. Endurance can be supported by a solid, historical foundation of successes and accomplishments. You will need these reminders when doubt and fatigue rise up to question your self-worth and block your efforts. They can weaken your endurance if you truly doubt your ability to succeed. In life, we must reflect more upon our wins than losses. The greater your goals, the greater your challenges. Total happiness is the complete destruction of the myth of total failure. Enduring any setback and rising up again are structures you are building on. To quote Churchill, “Never, never, never give up!” Train your mind to focus on your successes and strengths. Conquer the world within and you have conquered the entire world. This is true endurance.

Happiness Trait #4 Loss of Interest in Worldly Charms

To struggle and fight for elusive charms and false promises delays our maturation into true happiness. All of us have hoped glittering trinkets would bring us everlasting joy. It is only a matter of time before we recognize this absurdity. When we do, our struggle will end. Becoming free from the pull of ‘animal-like drives’ is the goal—not the shunning of all the wonderful objects and experiences life offers. When we view the charms of the world from a balanced, internally satisfied perspective, temptations become options instead of uncontrollable urges. Achieving clarity about our role in the world and the possibilities the world can offer us will lead to freedom from charms and temptations that previously were a daily source of despair and conflict.

Happiness Trait #5 Freedom from Conflicts and Distractions

Technology has transformed us into extraordinarily social beings. Cell phones and instant messaging have put us at the mercy of our connections. We can be called, paged, or emailed no matter where we are. Our privacy is evaporating. Over-socialization used to mean we were spending too much time visiting and not enough time paying attention to our needs. Today, over-socialization is due to our over-availability. We are not responsible for pleasing everyone and finding solutions to other people’s problems.

By becoming more responsible for me, I let people become more responsible for themselves. The crowd I thought I would have to shun never actually left. However, they completely changed their behavior toward me, and for the better.

Happiness Trait #6 The Desire for Happiness

All logic and reason tells us happiness is within our reach. This precious commodity brings us comfort, joy, warmth and security. This search for happiness can take a person to a church or a mosque, a priest or guru, to the stock market, casino, battlefield, or on a mountaintop. A burning desire to be happy means blooming right where you are planted. Relinquishing all requirements for the world around us to change, our efforts of self-transformation allow us to blossom immediately. We will be freed from subtle influences of the past and anxieties of the future. Living in the here and now is the permanent address of happiness. It takes time to gather enough experience to realize the importance of letting go of yesterday in order to find happiness today.

Blair Lewis, author of, Happiness: The Real Medicine and How It Works is a seasoned and recognized expert of holistic medicine, Ayurveda, and yogic sciences. Visit: www.AliveandHealthy.com for additional information.

A Metaphysical, Spiritual, Holistic Publication   |   In Light Times   |   Issue Index